Living in a Bankster’s Paradise

For those longing for the good ol’ days of shadowy conspiracy theories involving Washington and Wall Street instead of daylight robbery, there is hope. We still have the opportunity to speculate about vast quantities of lobbying money, secret donations, promises of support and power, or maybe even blackmail to get so many politicians to completely ignore the outcry of Americans against the bailout of Wall Street “banksters.” Whatever the price, it was surely a sound investment for those living in Bankster paradise, about to receive hundreds of billions of dollars from us poor folk who are already overwhelmed with debt. The audacity of asking us, with a straight face, to give them so much money without supervision, with no oversight at all, making the Banksters and their man in Treasury a law unto themselves, is simply outrageous. Almost as outrageous as the claims of the Gaddianton robbers in the Book of Mormon (e.g., the epistle in 3 Nephi 3 of Giddianhi to the Nephites with a message much like that of the Banksters: give us everything – it’s for your own good).

LDS rapper IcedMo is said to be working on the lyrics for “Living in a Banksta’s Paradise.” Suggestions or contracts welcome. My inside man shared a few lines so far:

As I walk through the valley of the shadow of debt
I take a look at my account and realize there’s nothing left
Cause the Fed’s been blastin and laughing so long that
Even Warren Buffet thinks our credit is gone

We be ruled by a gang that should be going to jail
But their man stared us down, said we’re paying the bail.
Their stock may topple, but they’ll be popping the bottle.
Doing it an your dimes. Make that a few trillion times. . . .


Author: Jeff Lindsay

5 thoughts on “Living in a Bankster’s Paradise

  1. Many years ago during a church conference the speaker said that Satan has only three tricks in his bag. He also said that all other “sins” could be circumscribed into these three. The three tricks are money, power and sex. I have never been able to find one that didn’t. During this $700 billion grab we can easily see the money and power trick. The third trick will be will administered to us soon.

    Richard G.

  2. Sorry about the extra “will” in the last sentence of my post. I had been editing the sentence and failed to catch it before sending.

    Richard G.

  3. Anon, I would go so far as to say hat all those tricks can be characterized into 1 “Sin” (and I take this from C.S. Lewis),
    and that is Pride. Money, power, and sexual dominance all fit into the concept of having more than the other guy.

    As to your post, Bishop Lindsay, I would say that it is in our best interests to do what we can, but we can only do so much. It is obvious from the many signs that the that great and terrible day is coming soon, and so I would say that it can only get worse before it get’s better. Still, we have a responsibility to do what we can now, regardless of that information, as you have illustrated in your post. Thanks, as always, fro such thoughtful posts.

  4. This entry destroys your other satirical posts, Jeff. Good job.

    Richard-I LOLed at that last part. It will probably be deleted, though.

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