Relationship Tip: The 90-Second Rule

I try to avoid promoting specific commercial products and services in this blog (apart from a few hints to my secular but still inspiring publication from John Wiley & Sons). However, the video below from a commercial group offers advice that I think is terrific. I don’t think this comes across as commercial, and hope you’ll find it appropriate and helpful.

After you’ve been away from someone you care about for more than a couple of hours, take a few seconds to clear your mind and focus on how you can strengthen that relationship as you encounter that person. The first 90 second on interaction upn coming home or being re-united can be so critical. Make it count. Wish I had thought about this years ago! Still time to improve, I hope!


Author: Jeff Lindsay

13 thoughts on “Relationship Tip: The 90-Second Rule

  1. Great reminder for what is important in life. With all the chaos it is helpful to realize that something so small has such a big impact. Thanks.

  2. Thanks for sharing this! It's nice to learn some simple things we can to do make our relationships better.

    I recently learned something about our temple marriages too. Our goal is a celestial marriage, something higher than the world's idea of marriage. I've learned I need to ask myself, "Would Heavenly Mother do this to Heavenly Father?" If I can't imagine it, I probably shouldn't do it. That's made a difference just in the last two days.

  3. "Would Heavenly Mother do this to Heavenly Father?"

    That's a very weird question. But I guess if it helps you…

    I watched that video with my wife and noticed that it's always the men who have to live the 90-second rule. Now, that's probably reading too much into it, but my wife looked at me with those eyes that suggested I haven't been living that rule all that well! 😉

    Always room for improvement…

  4. I try to be conscious of the example of puppies. They are always focused and excited to see you after having been away. Does make a difference.

  5. How true this message is. When I was a teenager, my future father-in-law, who was the stake president at the time, really led by example in this area. Whenever I was over their house when he came home, I would watch him come into the home, go immediately to where his wife was and kiss her in a pretty passionate sort of way, hug her, and whisper to her as he smile and stared at her with an "I'm am crazy in love with you" look. Then, he would greet all his children with a big smile, bright, interested eyes, and ask them how their days were. If I had timed this, I would say that it all probably took about 90 seconds or more (a significant amount of time when you actually stop to watch the second hand tick). It was a beautiful thing to witness, and the love in that home was thick. I only wish I had practiced it the way he did.

    Thanks for sharing this, Jeff. I am committing to living this out and setting the tone of love and acceptance for my home.


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