Most Americans Pro-Life? Think Again Before You Get Too Excited

OK, so you’ve seen the news about the the recent Gallup poll showing most Americans are now pro-life. For those of us who are haunted by the violence of abortion, the poll is welcome news. But before you get too excited and think that now we can start electing more leaders who will protect the lives of the most innocent and vulnerable humans among us, recognize that this poll is seriously flawed. It was based on heavily biased sampling of just a subset of Americans and is not representative of actual American VOTERS. Why? Because they only surveyed living Americans. They completely neglected dead voters, and we can hardly expect the dead to share the same pro-life views as other voters

We need to pay more attention to the dead in these matters. They really count. When cities like Detroit or Milwaukee have more registered voters than living eligible citizens, you know the dead are playing a huge roll in our society. Let’s reach out to them and at least include them in polls. Maybe we Mormons can help. We’ve got baptism for the dead–why not ad opinion polls for the dead? And maybe we can spread a little pro-life advertising toward their side of the veil while we’re at it. Hey, if we can just get everyone who becomes Mormon on the other side to vote pro-life, maybe we could swing a few elections here in mortality? Nah, we don’t want to politicize temple work too much. Any ideas?

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Author: Jeff Lindsay

6 thoughts on “Most Americans Pro-Life? Think Again Before You Get Too Excited

  1. Typo alert: “they completed neglected”.

    I think the key to winning this thing is to capture the as-yet-unborn vote. I’m sure ACORN can figure out how to get them registered.

  2. I think you are on to something. In Chicago where there are enough deceased voters to provide a statistically significant sample, the dead always vote Democrat.

    Yet with their willingness to come back just to vote, perhaps we can assume that they would break with their party and vote pro-life?

    Do you recall the angels above us, who are ‘silent notes taking’, as referenced by the hymn? Perhaps they would be willing to take a heavenly poll on this topic. It would be an interesting diversion from watching us all day.

  3. I get the joke you are trying to make I think. But it seems to me you are conflating registrations with votes. Or are you saying significant numbers of actual votes are being cast on behalf of dead people?

  4. Jeff, you are hilarious! Does this mean that opinion surveys of the dying-but-not-quite-dead would be the new “exit polls”?

  5. To Geoff: True story: A neighbor of mine took her elderly Mom to vote in her Chicago neighborhood. She noticed from his page in the voter registration book that her Dad had already voted that day — except her Dad had been dead for over a decade. When she told her mother, the woman said, “it’s ok, they send guys over to shovel my walks when it snows.” Yes, in Chicago, dead people are retained on voter lists and votes are cast in their names.

  6. What about inheritance rights? I fully expect to be able to pass my voting right on to my estate, thus extending my influence post-mortem. Now I just need to figure out how to vote on behalf of my dear dad who passed on 2 short years ago. This will be especially gratifying because I live in Illinois.

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